the goverment cat

The Four Catz !




Four men were bragging about how smart their catz were .

The first man waz an Engineer, the second man waz an Accountant, the third man waz a Chemist and the fourth man waz a Government Employee.

To show off, the Engineer called hiz cat,

"T-square, do your stuff."

T-square pranced over to the desk, took out sum paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.

But the Accountant said hiz cat could do better.

He called hiz cat and said,

"Spreadsheet, do your stuff."

Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookiez. He divided them into 4 equal pilez of 3 cookiez ............ Everyone agreed that waz good.

But the Chemist said hiz cat could do better. He called hiz cat and said "Measure, do your stuff."

Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk,, got a 10 ounce glazz from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ouncez without spilling a drop into the glazz.

Everyone agreed that waz pretty good.

Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, "What can your cat do?"

The Government Employee called hiz cat and said....

"Coffee Break.....do your stuff."

Coffee Break jumped to his feet........ ...

ate the cookiez..... ......... .

drank the milk........ ......

screwed the other three catz........ ......... ....

claimed he injured his back while doing so.......... ........

filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditionz.. ......

put in for Workerz Compensation. ......... .....and

went home for the rest of the day on sick leave....... ......!!! !!!!!!!

Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow iz grazing in the field"
Student : A cow and a bull iz grazing in the field
Teacher : How?
Student : Ladiez first.

UNIQUE AND VERY PRECOIUS DJJJJJJJJJ

DJ MY JAN MY WORLD...

THANKS

KABIR KHAN

thankz kabir

Once a Sardar Jee had a verbal fight with an American on who the more prosperouz of the two waz.

American: But we were the first on the moon!
Sardar Jee: Oey! You! I'm the first on the sun!
American: But you can't be the first on the sun. You'll burn!
Sardar Jee: I'm not stupid, man. I go at night.

Politicians-pakistani Style

PLEASE FILL THIS FORM ASAP, PAKISTAN NEEDS A PRIME MINISTER BADLY.

Application Form To Be Filled For Contesting Pakistani National Assembly Elections.

1. Name of Candidate: ______________________

2. Present Address
(i) Name of Jail: ______________________
(ii) Cell Number: ______________________ (If not in Jail, attach proof of residence)

3. Political Party: _______________________
(List ONLY the Last Five parties in the Chronological Order)
---
---
---
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3.a. Size of party
A. Myself
B. Me & my family
C. Enough to occupy a Tonga

4. Gender :
A - Male
B - Female
C - Nawaz Shareef
D - "General" (any)

5. Reasons for leaving last party (circle one or more)
A - Defected
B - Expelled
C - Bought out
D - All of above

6. Reasons for contesting elections (circle one or more)
A - To make money
B - To escape court trial
C - To grossly misuse power
D - To serve the public
E - I have no clue
if you choose "D,- attach Certificate of Sanity from a Recognized Very well known Psychiatrist )

7. How many years of public corruption experience do you possess?
A - 1-2 yrs
B - 2-6yrs
C - 6-15yrs
D - 15+yrs

8. Give details of best criminal cases pending against you (Restrict upto best 5; Attach a separate sheet)

9. How many years have you spent in Jail ?
A - 1-2 years
B - 2-6 years
C - 6-15 years
D - 15+years

10. Are you involved in any financial scams ?
A - Why not
B - Of Course
C - Definitely
D - I deny it all
E - see a foreign hand.

11. What is your Annual Corruption Income ?
A - 10-50 Crores
B - 50-100 Crores
C - Overflow...
(Convert all your $ earning from Hawala etc. to Rupees)

12. Do you have any developmental plans for the country in mind ?
A - No
B - No
C - No
D - No
E - All of the above

13. Describe in space provided, your achievements, if any.

Phir Bhi Dil Hai Pakistani

Coke Peete Pepsi Peete
Bhool Gaye Nimbu Paani
Phir Bhi Dil Hai Pakistani

MTV Channel V Cool Hain
Bhool Gaye PTV
Phir Bhi Dil Hai Pakistani

Reserve Bank Hain Khali
Khali Swiss Bank Mein Maal Paani
Phir Bhi Dil Hai Pakistani

Ideas Hain Naye Naye
Problem Wohi Purani
Phir Bhi Dil Hai Pakistani

Hong Kong Main Honeymoon
New York Main Meri Naani
Phir Bhi Dil Hai Pakistani
Kapde Hain Amreeki
Gaadiyan Hain Japani
Phir Bhi Dil Hai Pakistani

Paanch Saal Mein Chaar Government
Dekhi Suni Na Jaani
Phir Bhi Dil Hai Pakistani
Phir Bhi Dil Hai Pakistani